Normally when I set out to compose a blog I google R. Kelly lyrics and go from there. Tonight, the muse paid me a visit and whispered softly in my ear: "Why don't you try just googling R. Kelly?"
Who knows where ideas come from?
Suffice to say, the very first thing that came up was this: http://blogs.suntimes.com/rkelly/2008/06/r_kelly_covers_face_as_attorne.html
To sum up, the blog is actually a blog about the R. Kelly trial. (How did I not know about this? Oh, yes. Because it hadn't yet occurred to me to google just plain R. Kelly. How stupid of me.) Anyway, so in this blog, the entry in question describes a [real life] scene wherein R. Kelly's lawyer - a sort of classic, white-haired, bespectacled aging white man in an expensive suit - reads aloud some lyrics from the R. album.
The prosecutor giggles. R. Kelly covers his face. And the judge allows the jury to have the CD in the end, but only with the lyrics themselves blacked out.
Because even the JUDGE knows that there's something completely different about these lyrics when they're not set to music, and when R. Kelly isn't performing them. In the other blog, the lyrics aren't written out at all. But you, dear readers, are familiar with some lyrics from the R. album: there's some political commentary regarding the first lady, a moral struggle concerning the IHOP, and of course, an elusive code-song concerning player hater base. The good news is, now we know why those player haters were trying to get the CD R. Kelly was carrying in the rain that day. They wanted to use it as evidence in the trial.
Anyways, I've made my point. Now I'm going to let you all try to imagine his lawyer (pictured here) reciting lyrics from the R. album out loud in a court of law.
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2 comments:
Seriously. When the fuck are we going to start our R. Kelly courtroom drama? The script is basically writing itself!!
And I know a certain YouTube phenom that would be PERFECT to play R.Kelly.
(You're going to be a primetime star, Ryan!)
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